It's Okay to Not Be Okay

    The guide to strength means no tears, no worries, no room for anger, frustration or fear. If we want to be strong we can’t let anyone see us break down. We’re so afraid to break down that we hide our most vulnerable emotions, because we don’t want them to be seen by others. Somehow we have it stained on our minds that tears, frustration, anger, worry, and other negative emotions that make us human equal weakness. This may sound like the way to being fearless and gaining strength as we stumble upon self confidence, but this is where we have it all wrong. Breaking down helps us to find strength and become more fearless.

    Life can quickly be filled with chaos, causing us to have many emotions towards the messiness that can unfold within a day. It’s natural to feel overwhelmed life gets crazy and it’s healthy to fall apart. As vulnerable as this may feel we can wash clean the print on our thoughts that says breaking down makes us weak. Falling apart makes us even stronger than hiding our emotions. The longer we keep these feelings hidden the more they build until we can’t take it anymore. The sewn on smile we work to keep  in place, will eventually become unstitched as it gets worn out over time. Pretending that everything is okay is worse than falling apart and allowing others to see how we truly feel. There’s no shame in breaking down, it’s okay to not be okay.

      The hardest part isn’t falling apart, it’s finding a way to do so in a healthy way. Surrounding ourselves with trusted loved ones is one way to express how we truly feel. In these relationships they often offer a safe place making become vulnerable much more relaxed and comfortable. Having someone to talk to or cry with also reminds us that we’re not alone as we experience the overwhelming feelings from life’s challenges. It can be refreshing to have someone who loves and cares about us there to listen even if they don’t know what to say or have any advice to offer. Another way to release bottled up emotions is to find a special quite place. Some people may prefer to be alone when unloading emotions and there are many options to do this in a healthy way as well. Going to an isolated area where we can journal, listen to music, meditate, or enjoy the presence of silence can be helpful. Exercise is also a great way to release built up emotional energy. Running, walking, hitting the gym, or finding a way to enjoy the outdoors can be an outlet to physically release stress.    

     The negative emotions that we occasionally have aren’t anything that we need to hide from but express in a healthy way, just as we do positive emotions. Expressing these types of emotions doesn’t define our strength or measure our weakness. It’s okay to break down. With the right people, outlets and safe place falling apart will only help to build us to become stronger.