How to Deal with Toxic Relationships with Family or Friends
Relationships with family and friends can be beautiful, uplifting, encouraging, life changing, fun and valuable when these relationships are healthy and wholesome. But not all relationships end up being this way. Some relationships are so unhealthy that they begin to affect your happiness, health and your confidence. When’s relationship no longer becomes fun or positive it’s super important to know how to handle it or else it may begin to destroy you little by little or in bigger ways than you can imagine.
Below are a few ideas for dealing with toxic relationships with family and friends:
Know the signs of a toxic relationship:
Sometimes you love certain people in your life so much that you overlook things, you accept things that are are unacceptable and you put up with a whole load of nonsense that you truly shouldn’t be putting up with. One of the ways to start to regain your power and freedom from such negativity is to truly know what a toxic relationship looks like and to know what isn’t normal in a relationship.
Here are some statements to think about when identifying a toxic relationship:
-A toxic relationship typically makes you feel bad about yourself most of the time,
-It’s a relationship that’s typically full of negativity,
-This kind of relationship affects your self-esteem and your confidence and your self-worth.
-It often doesn’t add much (or any) value to your life,
-It often holds you back from achieving your dreams, goals and your aspirations.
-It makes you feel as if you are being manipulated or controlled.
- Excessive arguments or fights seem to kick off often and sometimes it’s for no particular reason.
- You may feel that everything is wonderful and perfect one moment then the next the next everything is awful and completely unpleasant.
- You sometimes feel as if are constantly on the receiving end of jealousy, criticism and rejection.
- You might feel as if you are being emotionally or mentally abused.
Think of all the relationships that you have that are full of any of the statements above and you can definitely be sure that these relationships are toxic.
Spend less time with them:
If you have people in your life that are highly toxic spending less time with them is a great way to really take back your power and to raise your self-esteem. Because it’s almost impossible for you to blossom as a person if you are always around people that cause you pain and sorrow even if they are meant to be your family or friends.
‘Unforgiveness is like drinking poison and waiting for someone else to die’ -Marianne Williamson.
One of the things that you might be tempted to do when you’ve been mistreated for so many months or years is to hold grudges, wallow in self-pity, see yourself as a victim, stay in a place of unforgiveness or take revenge. But these strategies will often get you nowhere. The best thing to do for your well being and sanity is to forgive. Don’t forgive for their sake but rather do it for your own peace of mind and your own wellness because forgiveness really does begin the healing process and leads you into a path of freedom and abundance. One of the things that you might be afraid of in regards to forgiveness is feeling as if you have to keep having a relationship with these toxic people. The reality is you don’t have to. As mentioned above you can love these people from afar or spend less time with these negative people and focus on positive and wholesome relationships that add value to you.
Don’t blame yourself:
Sometimes we can blame ourselves for letting people take advantage of us or for letting them control us or use us or abuse us and in most cases when people do these things it has nothing to do with us but everything to do with them and their toxic nature so don’t blame yourself. Learn all the lessons that you need to learn but throw away all of the blame games, especially if you’ve done nothing wrong to deserve all of the mistreatment or abuse that you’ve received. If you’d kindness has been mistaken for weakness just know that you are not alone. This happens to some of the best people out there in the world.
Love them from afar:
Sometimes you just have to love your toxic family and friends from afar and refuse to feel guilty about it. Letting them into your inner circle is one of the best ways to end up going on a downward spiral as toxic relationships are often extremely damaging. So pray for them, wish them well, love them, but don’t feel obliged to be close to them. Only allow good people, encouraging people, supportive people, and uplifting people into your inner circle, people that love you unconditionally and people that you can trust.