Pursuit of Perfection
I wanted to write this month's post like a “letter to my young self” kind of thing. I know I'm probably super late on that bandwagon but bear with me. I want you to read it as if your older self wrote this for you, dear Reader.
It might seem counterintuitive but I think more people want to be “ideal” and more “perfect” in this 21st century than in the 1900s. The more accepted idea of imperfection has come to be, the more we want to pursue perfection. I am no different, dear reader but something changed this past month for me. Maybe it was the wiser me feeling this summer breeze or maybe it was the inner spirit calling out again, I had a moment of epiphany.
I just couldn't take it anymore. You know when you're running. It starts off all light and fresh but then there comes a point in that last lap where your body seems as if it can not take it anymore. Your lungs can not breath anymore. Your feet can not run any further. Your mind goes numb.
In those moments, as the slow acoustic tunes of silence go through your mind, you forget why you are running. “What am I running from?” “What am I running towards?” “What is my goal?” “Is there an end to this?” And as these questions cloud your conscious, you struggle to recall why you started running in the first place. That feeling of being lost and not knowing where to head anymore. All you seem to remember is that affirmation that you've repeated a million times in your dream “I want to be perfect”. But what is perfect ? Do you know?
Summer is the season where dreams are supposed to free. No bonds. No cages. But when you can't really describe what your dream is, how do you plan to achieve it?
The truth about my dream to be “perfect”, hit me somewhat like this.
I realised - The idea of perfection, like most constructs in life, was itself flawed. It was broken. To put it simply, I could not define perfect. What was ideal for me was not so for the person next to me. If perfection is not perfect either, why do we put yourself up for something so vague?
After giving it a thought, I thought to myself - For people who are driven by setting goals, aiming to be “perfect” is the best form of motivation. I mean just think about it once.
A goal that which is ever changing and so versatile. It's truly a one-of-a-kind target. But then it did make one wonder: How much of such motivation can we take? When do we rest?
Aren't you feeling burnt out?
We all want to feel that sense of achievement. It's a need. So why have we been chasing after something we can't even see in our mind's eye. It's like running around aimless, wishing to land into the place we saw in our dream.
I know it's been hard. Breath dear reader.
Life is supposed to be fun and free. Remember that.
You are already perfect in my eyes.
I wish you could see yourself that way too.